Feb 11, 2011

Gadis ABG

Gadis ABG
If you feel you're doing so much for your loved one but Gadis ABG does not seem to appreciate you or to love you back in a satisfying way; if you tend to enter painful or challenging relationships over and over; if you tend to love those who don't seem to love you back either completely or at all, then what's likely to be at play is a form of 'emotional dependence'.
The emotionally dependent tend to 'lose' themselves in the relationship they are in or in the 'love' they are feeling for someone. Those feelings and the thoughts around the object of their love are all-consuming and very little time is left for they own pursuits. In a relationship emotionally dependent individuals tend to do a lot for the other or at least tend to think a lot
Gadis ABG
about the other.
Although it's important to devote time and energy to our partner, it is not healthy when it is done at the expense of our own basic physical and psychological needs: the emotionally dependent has far less interest in her/his own life and much, much more in anything to do with the partner's.
Sometimes this is very obvious, when the partner becomes the whole reason for living and, when the partner is not present, even temporarily, the emotionally dependent feels some sort of void, either as if he/she does not exist at all or feels nothing but depression. The extreme cases will actually panic when the other is not present. Another extreme case of emotional dependency is when one stays in an abusive or neglectful relationship despite the pain that one feels everyday.


This is very similar to those who are not in a relationship but tend to devote incredible time and energy to the pursuit of a specific individual who may or may not reciprocate their feelings. Conquering 'the other' becomes a challenge and one's only way to feel 'alive'.

This condition, which is very common, especially in women, ranges from mild to severe and it's very difficult to accept for the individual affected. Moreover, it's not information widely available so the sufferer hits a brick wall of obsessive behaviour. It is very sad that on one hand we tend to highlight the importance of emotional autonomy to the point of rendering people incapable of opening up and create real intimacy; on the other side of the spectrum, we have individuals who are not aware that such fear of loneliness, fear of ending up like the 'cat lady', fear of being left by their partner, are all pathologies and do not base themselves on anything healthy. The first step to avoid love pain of the kind above described is therefore to realize that when you are experiencing such 'fears' you are actually placing your emotional happiness on external sources and this is absolutely not the way to find nor keep love. It may come as a surprise to some but if your life goal is to be someone else's partner you will not have the necessary traits which will make you a desirable long-term partner and you will therefore increase the chances of finding unhealthy, neglectful and even abusive partners or the chances of simply being 'left'.

2 comments:

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